Confused...

I'm just confused about life. There are just so many thoughts racing through my head. Its getting hard for me to keep track of my own life.

I feel a whirlpool of emotions in my heart.

A waterfall of worries is streaming through my head.

I'm getting lost. Lost in the desert of misery. Looking for happiness. I feel depression has won the war. I honestly don't know what to feel at this moment.

Should I feel happy, so everyone around me can see me as I want them to?

Should I feel mad, just at life for my hardships?

Should I be sad, in order to get rid of my tears to make room for more that will quickly come?

Should I even be myself? Fuck, I do even know who I am.

Should there be an end to this misery? Can there be an end to this misery? Will the cruel joke of life ever be over for me? Should I just be like many and run away?

If I were to run a way, there is something I fear. After escaping the land of depression, will life just hit me with more horror?

So many questions, I'm just wondering if I'll ever be able to find the answers. Or will I just drown in my own river polluted with tears, hate, anger, and everything evil.